So many people hate to speak in public. I used to count myself amongst this group. I used to look for a cure, when one day I realised that people like us do not need a wave of a magic wand. We should latch on to a  better understanding of what public speaking means and, …….for whom! Let me explain.

Exhibit one: An easy-read blog from Joel Comm discussed ‘how to overcome the fear of public speaking in five minutes”. Lots of very obvious tips that can be found all over the internet.

Exhibit two: Francesca Gino examined “how to make networking at conferences feel less icky”. If you do not understand the connection to the above, remember that networking is also talking in public to strangers, only in little groups as opposed to addressing them from a podium. Gino also produces useful generic info.

At this stage, those who are frightened will remain perturbed. Large audience or mingling, the questions bobble around our heads. What have I got to offer? Who will listen to me? I don’t even have the character / build / looks for it!

The common link to all of these points is that they are all addressed in the first person. It is as if we are saying that it is all about “the me”. Nonsense!!!

Comm and Gino have one common theme. “Think about what you can give, not just what you can get”, because it is not for you to judge what people do or do not already know. It is primarily about how your “content” can tweak an interest and a smile in those you meet!

I am a business mentor in Israel. One of the prime concepts that I try to bring to my clients is that they should be creating and delivering quality content for others, all day and every day. This can be while facing their own customers or carrying out back-office chores in private.

Therefore, public speaking and networking should be just a natural extension of this ability to produce innovative content on behalf of others. Why? Because it is not about “you”. In other words, you do not need a cure to an anxiety, but your are searching for a methodology  or some tips to help change your attitude towards interacting with people new in your life.