As their business mentor, two clients in the Jerusalem area have turned round to me in recent days and said “I can’t”. And they were adamant, one nearly had tears in their eyes.

In one case, the client did not feel they could manage their expanding enterprise. In the second incident, I was faced with an individual who felt that they could not take on a supplier, who was diddling them for a heck of a lot of cash. Challenging! And they would not budge.

The customary role of a coach or mentor is to listen. And then, when you spy an opening, you throw out a seemingly innocuous question and probe away. This time, I tried something different.

In both instances, I invited my clients to view a YouTube clip of a budding Australian ballerina. As a result of a car accident, the young performer would have been expected to have stood down from her routines. What she has achieved since that awful moment is simply staggering. I invite you watch here, and stay particularly alert for what happens after the 1 minute and 40 seconds mark.

What this item illustrates so clinically is that “can’t” is a lazy phrase. It is a cover up for fears. Most of us are capable of so much more that we realise. As a comparison, we are like the word or excel computer programmes, which offer vast options that only 95% of their users ever learn to apply.

In many ways, the elite Navy SEALS have a wonderful approach – the 40% rule. As Jessica Stillman writes, SEALS learn that:

…..when your mind is telling you you’re done, you’re really only 40 percent done….It turns out that the 40 percent rule is why so many people are able to finish marathons. When you hit that wall, you’re really only 40 percent through your stores of energy and determination. When your body complains, your will still has a lot to give. And as the success rate of runners makes clear, that’s true of just about everyone.

And where does it leave us in the world of commerce? You may not want to do something. You may not like the task in hand. But if you catch yourself using the “can’t” word, please understand that you are almost invariably distorting the truth. And such distortions damage your business.

For the record, both clients became empowered and sought alternative paths towards their goals.